Dear Music Career
This Sunday, you will be over. We will be through. I will put down my cello/s for a very long time. And it’s ok. We’ve had our ups and downs, we’ve had our love/hate relationship, you’ve taught me a SHIT LOAD about myself. You’ve been amazing. WE have been amazing. I have a rehearsal tonight, all day tomorrow and all day Sunday, with the concert in the afternoon. I’m excited about that, and yet so incredibly sad. My heart and stomach is in knots. I hoped I had kind of made myself a bit numb. I don’t think it’s possible; there’s too much on this now. I have to hold it together and get through this weekend. All those times as a kid when I’d just started playing and I wanted to give up… I never once saw myself, 26 years down the line, doing the the things I’ve done, seeing the things I’ve seen, meeting the people I’ve met. I know I keep saying it, but one day I’ll put it all out there. Tell the world why I have to, want to let you go. Or maybe I’ll just bury it all and hope it never rises to the surface again. I know one thing is for certain – it is time to put you to rest. I am so ready for this to be over now.
So very ready.
Yours, with 7 beautiful cellos, musical battle wounds, a head full of musical knowledge, a soul full hurt and her heart on her sleeve, Jay. x
~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~
Dear Silent Sunday Supporters/Posters/Viewers
As a result of events this weekend, I don’t think I’m going to have the strength to run Silent Sunday this week. After the (unfair?!?) stress everyone laid on me while I was trying to enjoy a MAJOR concert last week, I can just do without it this weekend. I have things to focus on, and nothing, nothing is going to spoil it. I know many (most? all? some?) of you won’t understand the significance of this weekend to me. But it’s a huge deal. So I’d ask that you just show a little respect and give me a break. I will do a Silent Sunday post, but just for one week there will be no linky. Please, do a Silent Sunday post too; if you tweet it to me, I will visit your blog as soon as I can, and I will RT if I have a spare 30 seconds. But please remember, I’ll be busy grieving. What would be appreciated more than anything, is your support.
Yours, doing the best I can and looking after myself this week, MBM x
~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~
Oh good luck with the show, and the putting down of the cello. It sounds like such a sad time, but one that needs to be done. You are very brave making that decision. I hope it goes well and isn't too emotionally traumatic. xxxx
You know where to find me lady. I big puffy paint heart you.
Dear Jay,
I’m sorry you are saying goodbye to your music career. But, it’s fairly obvious that you have your reasons. And if they make sense to you and make you at peace then that’s all you can ever wish for.
I love silent sunday. I love you for the concept. But we don’t have a parochial right to demand that you do it, we are not your nest of starving baby birds (too much coffee, very late night, just go with it, ok) and we can and will wait patiently for the time when you have the will and strength to run it again.
Stop beating yourself up. Eat bacon. Do you like bananas? Fried bacon and fried banana sandwiches (white bread) will cure what ails ya.
Big hugs, I think you are amazing lady.
Lisa @CoffeeCurls xx
Dear Jay,
I'm sorry that you are ending your music career. However, you know what you need to do, you know what makes your heart and soul happy and I don't doubt that you are doing it for the right reasons. But hey, change your mind and your talent will still be there.
I love silent sunday. I love you for the concept. I know that a lot of people love it too. But that doesn't give us any justification for demands upon your time. We know you have a family and we know that you have a right to 'me time'. We are not a nest of starving baby birds (bear with, late night, too much coffee, just go with it, nod and smile, ok), we will be ok. We can each post a silent sunday on our own little blogs in your honour. And as and when you are ready to run it again, we will leap upon you like a flock (?) of hungry vultures (feel obligated to keep on with the bird theme now).
Stop beating yourself up. Do you like bananas? Fried bacon and fried banana sandwiches (white bread) will cure what ails ya.
Big hugs, you're amazing, don't go forgetting that ok.
Lisa @CoffeeCurls xx
Sending you a great big enormous lezza snog with tongues. I will be thinking of you this weekend. I know you will be fabulous. And I know that, whatever you go on to do next, you will be fabulous at that too.
Bloody hell. I scare myself when I get serious.
Cut that shit out already.
*snog*
best best BEST of luck this weekend. I hope you go out on a high, and allow yourself time to grieve for something that has been a huge part of your life. And if people get stressy about the silent sunday thing? Stick 2 fingers up at them and go about your business. We'll be ready to bop them on the nose *rolls sleeves up ready*
big love x
All I can say is this: Good luck, we love you, we look forward to your Silent Sunday post, and I think I speak for all of us when I say that we're MORE than happy to support you, and give you a bloody well earned week off.
Much love xxxx
Good luck this weekend with laying your cello and those demons to rest. I can’t begin to imagine how hard it must be but it’s clearly something that needs to be done.
I’ll be thinking of you and how uber strong you are and if you need anything… you got my digits innit.
Word.
Good luck, good decision. Much love xx
Such a huge weekend ahead of you! Much love xxxxxx
Good luck this weekend and don't let anyone get in your way – We're big kids now, sure we can keep the game going between us for a week
(Twitter is a wonderful thing)
*hugs*
xxxx
Good luck and huge amounts of love xx
Will be thinking of you this weekend Jay and everyone will understand about Silent Sunday due to your decision xx
Best of best of luck my friend. I will be thinking about you. Give yourself time and space to grieve. I hope you enjoy every last second of Sunday. You know where I am if you need me. (Need to book our spa date!) Oh…and I'm with Pom up there *draws sword ready to fend off any selfish idiots* xxx
Best of luck for this weekend. What a monumental decision to make. I can't quite ever put the instruments down for good but I know that my performance days are over (RSI is a bitch) and it's for the best. There still are days I grieve as if I've lost a family member.
As for the reaction to last weeks Silent Sunday it was bloody appalling how some people held you responsible. Certainly not worth the stress if people just end up acting like they've had their toys taken away from them.
I totally agree you don't need the stress. Everything last weekend was completely beyond your control and I for one didn't expect you to sort it. I don't think people appreciate the effort that goes into keeping stuff like this going particularly when you're being asked the same question 100 times over.
Do what you have to do this weekend. Sod everyone else and focus on yourself. You have a right to do that. Anyone that doesn't accept that can go swing. (and they'll get short shrift from the rest of us too).
Hope it goes well this weekend. I'll be thinking of you.
Good luck for Sunday – sound like a massive decision you have had to make. Silent Sunday is a wonderful thing and I am grateful to you for hosting, but feel sad that you may have been hassled last week by other selfish people.
The very best of luck & loads love for you this weekend. Thinking of you as you go through this big transition.
I'm really angry and disappointed you got hassled last week, especially when you had so much on your plate already. Silent Sunday is really awesome and if there isn't a linky we can all just keep an eye out on the hash tag stream on twitter.
In the immortal words of the massively fab Rastamouse "No worry yourself!"
Great big hugs lovely & soothing thougths too. MWAH!!!!!
I wasn't even going to respond to comments just yet, but this had me smiling so much, I just had to say THANK YOU.
Appreciated more than you will EVER know.
xxxx
Don't worry about us lot! Anyone who isn't happy with your decision can do one. Those who appreciate what you do and respect you will more than understand.
Just take the time for yourself. We'll post our own little Silent Sunday posts in your absence.
Great big hugs to you xxx
Is there anything this woman can't do? Respect.
Have a great weekend and give yourself a break kiddo.
I'm new round these parts so don't really know the background to your decision, but it's obviously been a toughy.
I hope you get through the day in one piece.
I don't know who's been giving you stress, but I for one am hugely grateful for Silent Sunday. I know I've said it to you before, but it really has made me see the world differently and see the beauty in things that would otherwise have passed me by. So a massive thank you for that.
I will post anyway and be thinking of you xx
Will be thinking of you, look after you x
Wishing you strength for a turning-point weekend. In the manner of a wise old crone, I'll say that turning points are also exciting new beginnings with all that brings. xxx
Stopping anything that you love so much that you have a love/hate relationship has to be a major stressful change. I hope you find things just as beautiful and fun to fill the hole (and I don't mean Dildo Bob). I too missed what was going on last week – I think it must be being 7 hours behind, saw your tweets but didn't spot what was causing them. I'm sorry people gave you grief, it's the problem with the internet, people say so much stuff online they wouldn't dare say to your face. I hope you have a relaxing Sunday and find ways to make yourself happy. xx
Good luck! I hope Sunday is fantastic and you go ou on a huge high!!
Alll the best for Sunday, enjoy your last concert. I hope you get through it ok. Will be thinking of you xx
lots of luck, of course everyone understands. it's really important to take this time for you.
emma @loveoffilm xxx
Good luck with the show hun. Sending lots of love and supportive stuff your way for you. Don’t believe people went all nutso at you for the linky *hugs* some people are dicks.
Loads and loads of love (and possibly even some smoochy kisses and big cuddles!)
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Enjoy Sunday. We'll all be thinking of you. X
Wishing you an amazing weekend Jay. Be kind to yourself and just do what you need to.
I'll do a Silent Sunday, I already have the photo – linky or no linky it matters not to me.
Thinking of you. Mich x
Good luck for your concert!
I look forward to seeing your Silent Sunday post tomorrow x
Wow, this is a huge weekend for you. It’s the end of an era for you. I hope it goes well, and that you can look back and remember this weekend with good memories attached. Take care, we’re all rooting for you xx
Sorry …
I just tweeted you to show support for your weekend off SS…
But ON the music.
I am new to Twitter so was a bit trigger happy.
You don't know me well enough for me to be tweety.
Please excuse my over-enthusiastic typing, but the support was genuine (just a little over-eager)
Soz x
I hope this weekend goes ok for you chuckie egg. I'm sure you'll take everyone by storm, but most of all, try and enjoy it.
Thinking of you x
Good luck with your concert, I am sure you will be great, I hope you are not too sad and manage to enjoy it!
Lots of love coming your way x
Good luck Jay, thinking of you today xxxx
I hope this weekend has gone REALLY well and that it has indeed been the appropriate send off of your music career! Good luck and hugs.
Maggy
Hope you played your heart out, smiled, cried, and had a blast.
love
bj
Hope all went well yesterday at the concert. You look after yourself as long as you need to. Feeling for you xx