mocha beanie mummy

On a Tuesday, much like this one, 5 years ago to the day, I started my blog. I didn’t even give the first post a title. I had no idea what I was doing; all I knew was that I had a lot of stuff I wanted to say and document, and I wanted a way of doing it knowing that I could check back any time I liked.

People ask me “why do you blog”? Well, first and foremost, my blog is my voice. Without it, I’m in a whooooooooole lot of trouble. I know for a fact that without my little space here on the interwebs, I wouldn’t be alive today. I also wouldn’t have a ton of stories to tell me kiddos as they get older. I also wouldn’t be able to read back on the fucking awesome highs and the desperately hideous lows.

I’ve been through a ton of stuff. Had people throw crap at me here, had people offer all the support in the world here, made friends here, lost friends here, given away a dildo here, saw the creation of a dildo here, birthed 2 bloody large kids here, laughed, cried, ranted, chatted…SO. MUCH. STUFF.

If there’s one thing I’m proud of, is that I tried as much as I could to stay true to myself. I’ve done the odd review here and there, and stayed very honest with them (however I’m done with shit PR requests and have now changed my view on all of that bollocks…).

I’ve travelled to different parts of the world with this blog, taking all 6 of my readers along with me (I assume 6; it could be more. Maybe 9. I’m not sure, I’m not a stats whore I’m afraid) and oh yeah! I’ve refrained from becoming a stats whore. Which weirdly, feels like one of my greatest achievements.

I’ve become part of a team of ladies who help the anonymous blogging “community” (whilst fending off people who feel the need to make a song and dance deal for no reason at all, every time they feature an anonymous post – they {you} know who they {you} are, and dude{s}, I’d rather they {you} just kept their {your} distance to be honest, you know? It’s just creeps me a bit) and Blognonymous has helped a LOT of people find a voice where they were otherwise silenced. I understand the importance of that. SO. Very. Much. Our hearts have always been in the right place.

Shit, I could go on all day about the ton of crap I’ve lived through in this blog. It’s been an absolute hell of a ride, but the biggest and most important thing for me, as I keep saying over and over again, is that my blog IS STILL MY VOICE. I’ve felt censored a few times, for sure. I’ve written posts which have probably rubbed people up the wrong way, unintentionally. Fact is, I’m not here to please everyone. I didn’t sart this blog for other people.

I will continue to write. I’m going through an uncomfortable dry patch, while I try to balance JMP with being a mom of sorts and a wife in a fashion and maintaining bacon consumption. It’s a fucking difficult balance, I have no idea how I’m doing it, and shitting hell things are REALLY rough right now. But it’s ok, because I have my voice. I can still speak. 5 years later, I can still speak. That’s a good thing.

Happy birthday, Voice. Happy birthday, Blog. Been a hell of a journey so far, and still so much further to go, eh?