Dear , c/o Love it, Love it, Love it
THANK YOU for sending me to Cybermummy 11. If I’m honest, I felt you as a sponsor didn’t get the best deal out of it, but I certainly sing your praises both to people online, AND to people in real life. I don’t need to advertise you any more, Cybermummy is over. But I bloody love your products. So I’m gonna keep going, cos it’s bloody worth it. Also, I’m hoping family will your stuff for the boys this Christmas. It’s gonna happen, dammit.
Mom of two boys in awesome clothes, Jaysephine x
PS When I meet you, I still plan on licking and/or groping you.
~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~
Dear Sian
Thank you for making Cybermummy 11 hilarious for me, Mags and I missed you at the party though. Next time, yes? Also, thank you for “The Big Penis Book”. I haven’t shown it to The Mr yet, though it swiftly made it upstairs to my book shelf. I still can’t comprehend the penis tied into a knot to look like a pretzel.
I THOROUGHLY enjoyed reading it with you in Starbucks and then outside Subway!! Not entirely sure that kid in Starbucks is going to recover though. Thank you for being AWESOME. Love you big time, lady.
photo credit: Sian To
Yours with an EVEN BIGGER knowledge of penises (penii?), Jay
~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~
Dear Sian, Jen, Susanna and everyone behind the scenes
THANK YOU for Cybermummy 11. I know it is a colossal undertaking, and I can’t imagine how many sleepless nights there were. And I don’t envy you guys one bit. There were lots of things I loved, other things not so much. But most of all? Thank you for giving me a platform to speak to like-minded people about photography. I bloody LOVED it! Only, you’ve started something now, and I want to do more.
I totally blame you guys.
Thank you.
Loving my camera just a little bit more, JMP
~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~
Dear Eden Fantasys
Sweet baby Jesus THANK YOU. Thank you for helping me host one of the best UNDOUBTEDLY the best party I have EVER HOSTED. I need to do a write-up, but every time I start, I never know where to actually start. My house still smells like dildo, for one thing. But it’s a smell that is now becoming a fond one, thanks to you. The 27 or so girls who joined me had an awesome time (I think? I hope?) and I would do a party like that again in a HEARTBEAT.
photo credit: Tara Cain
I love you guys. A lot. Like, A LOT.
All dildo’d out, Jay x
~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~
Dear Utterly Scrummy
Sending me epic sized boxes of brownies to my house, just in time for me to take to the Dildo Decorating Party? Could you be any more awesome? There were still some left and they’re currently at someone else’s house. If I don’t have them back by the end of today *looks at Tara Cain* I may actually have a sizeable melt-down. The Mr and I will be sending goodness to your PayPal account shortly – you bloody well deserve it.
Not bothered about weight any more, Jay
Dear Haz, Fuzz and MDTaz
I MISS YOU GUYS. Thank you for making me smile. A LOT. And being normal. And not so much.
Hoping it won’t be so long til next time, J
~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~
Dear Attendees of the Dildo Decorating Party
Christ I don’t even know where to start. I laughed until I was very nearly sick. I was exhausted from lugging 2 sizeable boxes of dildos around the hotel. You all brought food, and drink, and more crafting stuff, and laughter cackling, utterly rude behaviour, and cleavage, and questionable limericks, and imagination and oh my god. We ran over by a good 45 minutes and I think the hotel staff were a little confused. Yet you had the room go from looking like a REALLY suspicious crafting party to immaculately spotless in less than 10 minutes.
I was so nervous the party was going to be shit, and you guys made it fucking awesome. I cannot thank you enough. I know many of you were wondering what the hell to expect, but you rocked it. When I finally summon the energy, I will do a proper write-up of what I remember of the party. I wasn’t even drunk, but I didn’t have to be.
Same again next year?
Wibbly wobbly hugs and air kisses, j&d-b
PS UPLOAD YOUR PIX to the Dildo Decorating Party !!
PPS If you got a red butt plug, you owe me a blog post plz… 
~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~
Dear
THANK YOU for taking a zillion photos of me while I worked the Blogger Calendar and allowing me to use them. You made me look kinda presentable! It was so good to meet you, I’m looking forward to working with you next year (where, having seen you, I really don’t think I’m going to have to work that hard actually…)
photo credit:
Yours feeling like a photo model, Jay
~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~
Dear Hyundai/#CMCar6
THANK for the car-share scheme, it was bloody brilliant. I had no idea how I was going to get to Cybermummy, given that I’m pretty much skint to tears. I had a hilarious time with @fenngirl, @LauraAWNTYM, @InsomniacMummy, @bumblings and @Tara_Cain. I will never be able to say the word “Hyundai” without creasing with laughter, Boho Rhap is alive again, oral sex will leave me asking questions and my moustache is still stuck to the front door.
Your Santa Fe was awesome to drive (whatever Laura tells you, it wasn’t 101 mph) and the rest of the team will tell you the breaks are excellent. As were your supplies. WIN.
Not really a girl racer, honest gov, Jay
~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~
Dear all who attended my #PhotoWorkshop
THANK YOU! I’m so glad you had a good time. I know some of you there were way beyond what I was teaching, but I thank you for having the patience to stick with it (and help out others in the group!). The support via tweets, blog posts and comments has been far better than I could have imagined, and I’m so pleased it was well received.
photo credit: Me, The Man and The Baby
I’d love to see if I can do more in the future, but right now I need to work out where the hell I’m at. And jump on board more conferences for bloggers. Hah!
Back, drop, tilt, Jay
~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~
Dear Everyone I Haven’t Mentioned Individually (Because I’ll blatantly have forgotten someone)
Thanks for bearing with me. Thanks for not being all weird with me and stuff. Thanks for having patience since the event while I trawl my way through a trillion emails and Lego figures.
Thank you ALL.
Jay and Dildo Bob
~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~
Dear Trevor
Nuff said.
J x
~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~≈~
Dear Readers,
If you made it this far, then bloody well done to you. NOW, you should go write some nice letters to some people and stuff. And then go throw yourself at Miss Kat.
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Smooches!!!
Mwah.
I am so loving that pic of you outside eat. It is genius and clearly my best portrait shot ever – thanks to your photo workshop.
Happy reading.
Love you. x
Looooooooooooove <3
You’re ‘hot’ baby not passable! Hehee. My pleasure and I’m glad you are able to use them. Love HMSx
Awwww! I wish we could do it all again RIGHT NOW!!
Oh and yes, the breaks on the Santa Fe were very *keen*
.
xxx
You. Lady. Are. Legend. #Fact
You so make me laugh, wish I had had the courae to have come up and said hi at cybermummy.
Always good to see you and great pics
I really should have gone to your photography session, I'm kicking myself for that one, but good to see the video. Lots of besos for you! x
Fantastic write up. Sad I did not come to your workshop now, I only have a basic digital camera and thought it would be people with flashy ones! Oh well, next time.
Loving the look of that book – wow!
Mich x
Love you Jay, thanks for all your support, and I don't feel hard done by at all. Mutual lickage shall occur. Oh yes, it shall.
*tongues at the ready*
Bloody hell, half of that comment got lost. It was an innocent enquiry to Sian asking where she got that book from. God bless Taschen and their 'artistic' tendencies.
Ruth,
Gay porn shop soho.
Don't ask why I was in a gay porn shop in soho – that is another story altogether!
*falls over laughing*
Good job I was along for the ride to keep you on the straight and narrow, eh *ahem*
*COUGH* *SPLUTTER* *CHOKE*
Was lovely to see you again! Always a pleasure..